coz I still miss you, scott

this holiday can get so overrated.
I think purely bcoz I miss someone too darn much and I can't do anything about it.
or can I actually?
I don't know. =(
sometimes I really start to doubt myself and the things I do.
I seek consolation in the most unexpected form. and I'd say that not all of them are good.
yeah, I know... what a thing to say bout self.?!
but I can't deny the fact that I always seek joy in something amusing.
I'm easily amused which can be a good thing. but bad at the same time.
you'll always see a happy face but you'll never really know what I'm feeling.
*sighs*

and sadly, he doesn't know...